Obituary in London Times

Obituary in London Times

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common
Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red
tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm;
Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't
spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not
children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned
but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy
charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for
reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for
doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their
unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get
parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Elastoplast to a student;
but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to
have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments
became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received
better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you
couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar
could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman
failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a
little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and
Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son,
Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It
Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was
gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority
and do nothing.